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Existential ism

baap | 13 October 2004, 11:36pm

Life, as of now...is EXISTENTIAL..yeah..yep...thats what it is! Everything now revolves around the fact that "that thing" exists! Delving into how that thing has affected your existence is not relevant, but the fact that it exists is what should be appreciated or depriciated. Its been a long time since ive actually written anything but the fact that my writing exists is providing me comfort. Things have suddenly become superficial now, i mean not in the negative sense but superficial as in the existential sense. I no longer yearn to look beyond what is present right in front of me. I used to do that before, which led to a wastage of precious mental space and un-necessary inconsistency of emotions to particular things or people.

For example: There is a certain person, let his name be "Saurav" Ganguly...ok. This guy tends to lead his life based totally on verbally or outwardly projecting his view of other people, to other people. Previously, i would "outwardly" wonder why such people do such stuff, but now such an outward thought process has given way to a more cursory examination of his existence. He exists, He does such stuff, SO BE IT. I have become more supple, more adaptable to situations to people, more accepting if u will, no more getting pissed off at "deliberately stained jeans". WHY?. I know it was Fun for the audience, listening to my woes. But the truth of the matter is that, these were actually MY WOES! Small things like...Soap-Opera acting and insignificant things were my Primary Woes, the problem was that i dint priorities my disturbances/distractions...all of them were automatically HIGH Priority. From things like...."Sunsilk Black Shampoo ads showing why marriages solely depends on hair-texture" to "Whether im going to get a job or get a good score in GRE", all these woes were TOP Priority, which was proving to be too tough to handle!

So i have left the shampoo based woes to an existential prioirty, while the other woes i take into serious consideration so that i can act upon them more effectively which in turn would affect my life in some significant manner!

Another thing i have realised, or rather acheived unfortunately! I have discovered the limits of my Brain!, I have driven my brain to overload so many times, that there just isnt any way to take in more data (in the pure scientific sense), i mean there have been times, where i have to force myself to STOP THINKING Completely...in order to achieve something trivial like brushing my teeth or drinking Water or Sleeping! This saddens me, as my imagination is being restrained to do things it is best at doing! DREAMING!!!!! YES, I cant Dream anymore...this deliberate restraint on the mind has extended to the total shutdown of the "Dream Theatre" (*smirk)...while sleeping. No More time accelaration methods while driving....or doing some monontonous activity. Driving for example, has become easier...before i used to consiously daze in order to shorten journey times, but now it doesnt work.

Im on the verge of losing all of my creative abilities (however little they are)...SEE There right there.....the brackets before signifies this! I am becoming Cyncial of MY OWN SELF! SHIT......AWESOME-OH!

Current Mood: Thoughtful
Current Music: YES! - Owner of a Lonely Heart

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Comments

  1. 1. By drp  |  14 Oct 2004, 12:36am

    wat the heck is "awesome-oh"?! new word u pick up n use it like there's no 2mro n expect us to digest it?!
    well NO.


  2. 2. By baap  |  14 Oct 2004, 3:29pm

    I WRITE A WHOLE FRIKKIN PAGE...AND ALL U SEE IS "AWESOME-OH"?????????



    awesome-oh :p


  3. 3. By romu  |  27 Oct 2004, 8:09pm

    Nirvana!





    PS: 21 'i's in the post.........(just thot wud mention it.Ok,Lite . forget it.


  4. 4. By Bigmouth  |  29 Oct 2004, 2:34am

    Nirvana ?

    @Romu: Why do you say such things and say Ditch ? SAY the entire thing goddamit !!!

    @Baap: Sorry for replying to others comments which is no business of mine ... ice post. My 'n' is't workig !!!


  5. 5. By Utopicillusion  |  3 Jan 2005, 7:08pm

    Do i see a Southpark angle in here?? Season 8 for your reference!!


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