Of Life and All Else...

Rarely, if ever, do I get into a sombre mood where more than my rants and raves about anything and everything on this planet mean to me the songs of the chirping birds or the sweet smell of wet earth after rains.

I would not say that I am an overtly sentimental person, but there are just moments when everything gets stuck in temporal flux. I get transported into a whole new realm where reality either does not seem to exist or it transforms itself into a form so beautiful that it actually makes sense. Unlike Wordsworth, I am not capable of being pensive or vacant, though these occasional moments do bring out the poet in me.

The beauty of the night sky, the tippy-tappy sound of raindrops on a tin roof, the industrious ants busy carrying and stashing food, the serenity at dawn, the rusling of leaves under my feet during autumn, the breath-taking profusion of flowers during spring and the noises little children make when they play enchant me no end.

I feel thankful, etrenally grateful to the Gods above for giving us a world with so much beauty that it appears one life-time is not enough to appreciate it. Nature overwhelms me, and I do not care if my next moment were to be my last. In fact, I would like it to be my last...

Current Mood: Gloomy
Current Music: Every day is a winding road

There is not a lot that I consider unethical or immoral. In fact, I firmly, and rightly may I point out, believe that there is a clear distinction between what is ethical and what is moral. But, we shall get into that a little later.

Like I said, not that what I say means anything (if it did, I would have been sued to poverty - if I had the money, that is), I am highly flexible when it comes to conscientious issues, so flexible that I make Dick Cheney and George Bush appear as men of impeccable honour. There is, however, a point where even I draw the line.

Everyone wants to be popular, to satisfy their deep-seated psychotic need of being important. There is nothing wrong with that. But, is blogging the way to do it? Well, yes and know. Blogging is a very chaste and pure medium. It is something that only a few can use to say for other people what they cannot say for themselves for it requires the gift of the gab. And, this is where I have a problem. Of course, there are not many things that I don't have a problem with except perhaps Cindy Crawford's cellulite-free ass, a fine specimen I must say.

All this talk may make you wonder whether I think I am the most important person in the whole wide world. You are wrong. I do not think I am important. I know it. 'Through and through. Balls to bones', in the words of the Oracle. That most people think I am a jack-ass is something I shall not delve into. You are all intelligent, thinking people. Decide for yourself, and don't let the loony thoughts of half the world influence you in any way. Anyone can swim with the stream. Only salmon swim upstream. So, what if they are all dead after they spawn? Atleast they get to spawn!

Now that we have digressed from the subject at hand let us keep at it. I really do not like retracing my steps, unless I have to when I am going back on my words to avoid taking responsibility for whatever I have said like I will in the next sentence. Whatever I have stated so far has been quoted out of context with malicious intent, and whatever I am about to say has the potential for misuse as well. There. That is out of the way.

On one of those rare moments when I read, I learnt that over three-fourths of all web-based mail sent today is spam. It does not make an iota of a difference to me. But, it got me thinking, and that happens less often than the transit of Venus. Is only unsolicited mail spam? Does not a whole gamut of other things come under the definition as well? There is no easy way of saying this. Considering the number of posts on my blog, it seems to me that I am the only person who does not spam. Damn! How on God's green earth did I attain this decadence and depravity? The bar was already set extremely low but I still managed to slither from right underneath it. Yoo Hoo!

Current Mood: Gloomy
Current Music: This kiss

Rumour has it that women are taking over the world. I have nothing against it. I give a rat's ass to whoever the world belongs to. I have nothing against women either. I just don't like them.

That is not a crime as long as I do not let my feelings come in the way when I am interacting with women. And, trust me when I say that I do not let my feelings interfere with my work. I don't work. I also don't discriminate against them - all my feelings are equally important to me.

Women have failed in their basic objective, which was to woo men. That is how the word came about. There were men and then there was this set of people who used to woo men. They have  coined atrocious words like chivalry to pass the baton of courtship on to us. Some of them even have no use for men. They are called lesbians. Put simply, lesbians are those women who have gone too far trying to do a man's job.

This post is not about women or about men who go on and on about how the world would be better off without the female of the species. It is about lesbians. And, this is of concern to us because I have insider dope that fullhyd.com is run by a bunch of some really hot lesbians, not that their being hot is of any concern to me. But, when you call a lesbian hot does it mean that she is hot in the sense of a straight woman being hot or does it mean that she is hot in the sense a lesbian is hot to another lesbian? I guess we will never know because the woman who gave me the dope swings both ways.

I say, all women should be lesbians. Why? Because it would be one way to take care of the growing world population, once and for all. But, I don't even care two hoots for the world. So, why do I propose this? Because it would dramatically bring down stress levels in the heterosexual male. When there is no woman available for him to mate with, there is no reason why he should continue to spend more than a third of his waking hours thinking of sex and bikini models, thus giving himself no cause for anguish and frustration when he does not realise his fantasy.

Current Mood: Gloomy
Current Music: You better get this party started

When I was a boy, I was given all my wants
Now that I have grown, care has begun to haunt
No more do I possess that flair
Which made me win everywhere
All of us go through ups and downs
When I slide I simply roll along
Plummeting into darkness of a bottomless hole
The earth seems to have let go of my sole
I scream but no louder than I could if my mouth was filled with soot
Or is it that my echo has given me the boot
I have none who I can turn to for help
Did you say God? He has become a curse
I am an atheist because whenever I found a reason
He simply performed acts of treason
Equal may be created all men
After that they are not the same
Some are born to win, others to lose
Those like me forever get the blues
We try, we work, we sweat out we toil
What we get in return is our blood on the soil
Hope is something the meaning of which we know
We exist on that, doesn't it show?
I travel, my destination hitherto unknown
My soul is lost, my body haggard and woe-begone
And yet, life moves on...

Current Mood: Gloomy
Current Music: November Rain

It was not all that long ago when a mail was sent from fullhyd.com, a mail that was to set new benchmarks when it came to instigating people into doing something as absolutely purposeless as blogging. In fact, it even got people to read those blogs. Man, what a mind job! I don't normally appreciate anyone but those at fullhyd.com deserve every ounce of this praise (what, you did not expect me to give them heaps of it, did you?).

There is a flipside to this. There are some of us with a constant need to be in the public eye, to be in the limelight, to be the focus of attention. The need is so great that we would do anything short of murder (sometimes even that) to get it. And this is where fullhyd.com failed in its duty towards society. In taking away that urge in those like us to murder people they have only succeeded in prolonging their miserable existence.

Then there are others - those who have no such need. And they always make me think about them - Jeez! What a bunch of losers! Why would anyone want to live the life of a nobody? Do yourselves and the society (Yeah, right! You would not know what soceity means, would you? Clue: It is one of those things that you could never get into.) a favour and do the right thing. There is a fine line between being vain and being full of yourself. I crossed that line years ago.

So, don't grudge me when I say that I am the best. I don't grudge you when you say it, do I? I also don't like arguing with idiots. Someone once told me that arguing with idiots was like running in the special Olympics. Even if you won you were still a retard. It is sad that he is not alive today. He had an accident, an unfortunate one. And, I had nothing to with it.

Current Mood: Gloomy
Current Music: Against Sepulchera

It happened to me last night. As I lay on my cot listening to the constant whir of the ceiling fan, trying to keep whatever heat it could out, it suddenly hit me. Just out of the blue I had found the answer to one of the most profound questions dogging mankind from time immemorial.

I say time immemorial because to most of us anything that happened before our existence is meaningless. That does not really apply to me because I have been existing ever since the big bang. How and why I cannot reveal. It could throw the entire cosmos into chaos.

Anyway, the question. On hindsight, and hindsight is a wonderful thing because everything appears so much simpler then, it does not appear as profound. But, then that is always the case. When you were a year old, your first step was an achievement. Now you just take it for granted.

So, what is that question? Really, if you have not been able to fathom it yet I am sorry to say that your future does not hold a lot of promise. I see dark clouds hovering over you. Beware of that silver lining. It might just be that bolt of lightning.

Putting all speculation to rest (Hah, like any of you was speculating! I don't hold that against you. It is not your fault that you were born dumb.) we return to the matter at hand. Be warned. This is no ordinary matter.

Why is it that people blog? No, that is not the question. The answer to this is simple enough. They need an outlet for their creativity and since Penguin Books won't give them that fullhyd.com is the next best thing. What is mysterious, that is up until I solved it, is what makes people read them.

One word. Free. People would take anything that is free. Don't believe me? You read this post, didn't you? And it was an utter piece of crap!

Current Mood: Gloomy
Current Music: Material Girl