Posted by D.Raw El Payne 19 July 2004, 11:35pm

There's jus something about exam application forms and their deadlines. That is, when I see them for the first time. Its the way my heart starts to race, its the way I see myself facing my nemesis again, facing upto destiny's wrath and showing my middle finger. December 31st folks, the results. Its been a while since I felt thisaways, its like being back in "intensive-coaching" again, the weekly mock-exams, the continuous drilling by the lects about how this is the biggest thing you'll ever end doing in life, while fact is, just about every exam I give in life seems bigger than the last one. Or so my mind goes.

I just saw the fucking deadlines, and the date of the results, and somewhere in between - the date of the exam itself. Btw, folks....Welcome to Payne's World : The World of the Supah-Geek. I love it here, I love the goddam entrance exams, all those poor souls sitting there, raking their brains, fiddling with their pens, scribblin away with their pencils, folding/refoldin hankies....damn.

November 21st. CAT. Just another Mock for moi.

Tension mounts in the Dungeon of Payne.


Current Mood: Grand
Current Music: DJ Suketu - Soul of Bombay dammmn now THIS is trance

Posted by D.Raw El Payne 19 July 2004, 6:41pm

There are  books which are un-put-downable and books which are jus un-fucking-put-downable. Its 2:30AM in the real world, but over here in Payne's World the sun is out and its one bright mofo mornin class in the IIT. Our hero for the night is actually five minutes early to this class.

I'm talking 'bout Five Point Someone. 140 pages through and it doesn't look like the Payne is going to sleep tonight. Its been a while since a book has kept me awake, made me smile, made my heart do a lil flip, brought a lump in my throat, or even made my jaw-drop with wonder. I guess, one of the (many) reasons I'm so in love with this book, is 'coz I can actually relate to it. But hell, if I said that, I would be bringing down the level of this book, this is a fucking masterpiece is what it is. Heck,calling it a 'book' in itself is weird, its like reading the best narration of a fictional-real-life ever. Its like reading an exaggeration of the truth ,definitely this book is based on the author's real-life experiences. I say exaggeration, not like a bad thing, this is exaggeration at its best(I need to expand my vocabulary). Every nitty-gritty detail making me reflect on my life.....ok, I haven't finished the goddam book. Who knows, maybe its time for the first Payneful Book Review! :-O

Signing out from the front bench of an Indem class, IIT-Delhi, Batch of '95.



EDIT :  4:42AM in the Dungeon of Pain. I'm done with the book. I can hardly remember the last time a book brought about some many emotions in one night. Kinda speechless and extremely sleepy. All I do remember is, the last time I stayed up all night - IIT Chennai, Jan 26th 2004.

Current Mood: Shocked
Current Music: ghar aaya pardesi....

Posted by D.Raw El Payne 19 July 2004, 1:53am

Wow. This whole writing business is so goddam funny. I remember bein' all preachy and shit in a previous post talkin 'bout expectations and how you shouldn't let 'em get the better of you. Well, in the past two days, it bit me right back in the butt ('it' being expectations ...and also an ant). I mean, a chic comes up to me n says "omg!! U r payne? wow! u're so goddam funny! omg!! I can't believe it! U r payne?! wow! nauseam..." Well, being the superhero I am , I was kinda flummoxed as to how she recognised my avatar (**hint hint : bare torse **hint hint). (The last 3 sentences are a gross distortion of the truth).

That being that, my goddam super-hero post got me pasted onto the goddam front page of fullhyd, goddamit. These goddam press people will do anything for publicity ,I say. I mean, I ain't page 3 material, leave alone "Hot Blog" material! The things they do for hits...the things they do..sheesh. NEway, all I'm saying is, I thought they put me on a goddam pedestal, while ,infact, all they were doing is showing me that there are humans out there who actually like reading my shit! Or maybe its jus the omnipotent KKK n all his various avatars givin' moi the hits...hmm..I dun care, me getting hits, me happy, goddamit.

So there, all this goddam thought-process 'bout all this goddam new-found audience made me actually sit and think 'bout what I was gonna blog about next. Ha ha ha HA! ROTFL!! I actually mentioned "think" and its other forms TWICE along with "me" and its other forms in the same goddam sentence! I don't think before I post! Wtf ever gave me that idea! Now that I'm relieved of that pain...its time to actually start typing coherently again.

Sports. Of course, I'm making it quite obvious that I'm fresh off the IND-SL match, that we just bummed out of. Sport stands for everything that I love in life. Hope, triumph, elation, euphoria, the depths of depression, hatred, and bumming it. Hope, damn, I already posted on this before. In this context howevah, every goddam game, till the last ball is bowled, I'm actually sitting with my heart in my throat. Blindly faithful that my immense concentration ,on the proceedings on the field, will somehow alter the outcome. Ridiculously believing that I, lazing away on a couch, with my willpower ,can make the team win. Like everywhere else in life, I tend to be very optimistic in this regard too:P.

Elation, euphoria, triumph, depression, the depths. I'm a verrry influencable(is that a word?) fella. Sports, not only the real thing, even in movies(later on this) too makes me go like " :O :O, aaaaaaaa, noooooo, wooohOOOOOO! yeah man!!" (ok..that sounds like sumthin else...wtever!). Its one of the ONLY things in life which makes the Payne cry! The whole "goosebumps" effect while the commentators build up the tempo, the nail-biting finishes, the "this-piss-can-wait-till-the-next-break" effect which has had a surprising effect on men's libido all over the world, the "dead-body-parts" effect which makes gettin up from the couch damningly difficult, the "if-that-sunnavabitch-doesn't-score-now-i'll-maim-his-entire-family" thing (ok..this is gettin tedious).... I goddam love it goddamit!

All these add upto one helluva bumming experience. Btw, this on-off addiction of mine relates to any sport of ANY goddam kind. From cricket, Amreekan phuttbawll, soccer, F1, tennis, byasebawwl,baseketball, billiards(!), lan-gaming(*bwahahahahaha!) to even that game played with that ball made from bamboo and played like volleyball ,only with the feet. Some Indonesian thing. Oh yeah, that reminds me of beach-volleyball (ohhh yeah!). 

Thats about it for 2nite folks, I gotta go review some resumes and feed the lizards n bats.

See ya, wouldn't wanna be ya.



PS : 13 goddamits...not bad...not bad at all.

Current Mood: Relieved
Current Music: Metallica - Turn the page