There is something about nasal mucus that lures me to it. Mind you, it strictly has to be my mucus to be alluring. I wonder why other people do not have mucuses that are as charming as mine.

On the surface, my mucus might appear to you like any other's. But, that is only on the surface. Even you would not be so shallow to only go by the way things look on the surface. You must dig deeper, though, in this case, I would offer to dig for you. Is that not absolute bliss? Your workload has been reduced to almost nothing.

It is very difficult for me to detail the various properties of this wonderful fluid that make it so, well for paucity of a better descriptive, wonderful without sounding blatantly immodest and blaise. That is not a concern of mine, anyway. However, for greater common good (yeah, sometimes even I do that), I should like to warn those afflicted, or potentially afflicted, with inferiority complex to proceed with extreme caution. Would not want to be the cause for aggravating the intensity of your psycological disorders.

For one, the fluid in question has an amazingly uniform consistency - the kind you find in the air of Class 1 clean rooms. It has a smooth lamillar flow. It leaves no stains on white shirts. The colour is a beautiful shade of hazel-green. It is incompressible, with very high tolerances to large variations in temperature and pressure. And, most important, it is always available, without exception. In a nutshell, it is the perfect incompressible fluid.

It has varied applications, the most popular being its use as an adhesive. It makes a very good cleaning agent for Television screens (it is as on date in the test phase for cleaning computer monitors but the initial results are encouraging). Some have also reported to have used it as a cooling fluid, thanks to its high conductivity and heat transfer capabilities, although this application is not recommended by the International Union of Pure and Applied Nasal Mucus or IUPANM. Its use as a lubricant, though not widespread, is picking up and the IUPANM highly recommends it.

A few innovators have also proposed that it be used as a fire douser. So far, no adverse results have been reported but it is still too early to say if a reaction with water at high temperatures could be catastrophic. However, its application to elevate the boiling point of fluids has been cleared by experts.

Experiments conducted thus far have reported no untoward side effects of the fluid. But, it is always best to proceed with caution. A little bit of safety never hurt anyone, right? But, before using it make sure you do it under adult supervision and do not wear clothing that might stick to your body. Avoid using it at night, and if you really need to make sure that you use it outdoors.

Hope you have a good time using it. In case of dissatisfaction with the product, try your own mucus and compare results to this wonder fluid. You would be surprised at the amazing deal you got.

Current Mood: Gloomy
Current Music: 18 till I die...