aloque

Slowly the feeling of living alone is sinking in again. The nights are always tough, especially when all that I care about is back home. I never made the mistake of thinking that I wouldn't experience loneliness again, but a lot of time has passed since the last time I was feeling lonely and it still bites. I think this is the first time I have had a longing for home. Usually I just tune myself out but this time, things are different.

I am buying a lot of new stuff, and that is always uplifting. Tearing oen the wrapping off a new purchase, accompanied by 2 or 3 days of loving obsessing, such as folding the new quilt as soon as i get up, taking care that it never touches the floor and making sure all the new toiletries have their own spots on the shelves (if i had chalk, i'd draw chalk circles to mark their spots) .

There has been a lot of looking around. Some stuff like batteries, I can look at 2 brands and make a quick choice, but when I have to buy a cell phone or say, ummmm, a car (yay!) my legs are getting very weary with all the looking around.

Also when a person is making so many purchases, he is bound to be faced with a million salespeople and Bangalore has some of the most irritatingly dedicated salesmen/women in the world. I almost kissed that girl who wouldn't pay me attention when I went to the Webworld on Brigade road. All the stories you hear about car salesmen being evil and manipulative....all 100% true. All of them are such BITCHES. It seems all the companies' sales talk and campaign material is written by old ladies who ran out of wool. All they can do is tell the customer how bad the other company's product is. I had a headache by the time I was through the day. But there was a payoff. I could drive the cars to the limit on the highway, the inner ringroad, the city. Man, it was awesome when the Tata salesman almost hit his head on the windshield when I was "testing" the brakes. He looked so bewildered and sputtered like a goldfish out of water. Beee yooo ti ful. "Oh! aren't you wearing your seat belt??", I admonished him and rammed the car into first and took off again. 

There was the guy who sold me the well loved quilt. (In a mallu accent) "Sir, this is a compact model. You can carry it anywhere you go....see.. there is a handle on the cover that is made of best quality plastic. But, sir, that is not the specialty. This blanket will keep you warm in the winter, and also give you cooling sensation in the summer".

Quite impressive, my quilt. Compact, comes with plastic handle that allows me to carry it anywhere, in-built thermostat. I felt like Jackie Chan in the Tuxedo.

ok..back to work...

 

Current Mood: Cheerful
Current Music: Whats the story, Morning glory...Oasis

For the uninformed, aloque has had to leave his beloved Hyderabad again.

I am glad that I can keep in touch through fh. Its quite strange to stay alone again after being fussed by my mother for an entire year. I was getting soft and this can only be good for me. I am back to eating off the roads again. And the roads can offer the most amazing fare. All those who disagree may do so and they may also take a hike. Remember to pack a lot of food for the journey though.

I am going to inflict upon readers here aloque's gustatory gallivanting. First I thought I'd call it aloque's gastric escapades but that sounds a
lot more like what goes out than what goes in.

This morning for breakfast, I had the opportunity to visit a small
joint called The Veg Edge (specialist in Davanegere benne dose). So, I
order the special and i got the opportunity to watch the cook make it.
He spread about a cupful of batter and made out a 12" big dose and,
here is the insane part, he put about 12 dollops of butter on the dose
each about half a table spoon large. Man, thats a lot of butter, my
coronaries were protesting, but I was fascinated to say the least. He
let it simmer for a while and when it was a nice light brown, turned
it over. I was expecting him to put it in a plate and hand it over,
but what does he do? Thats's right, he put another dozen dollops of
butter on this side of the damn dose. I tell you the dose was floating
about 2 cms off the tava, with melted butter crackling mockingly at my
impending myocardial infarction.
My fascination gave way to salivation and despite my MBBS degree I
managed to absolutely enjoy the crispy, buttery Davanegere benne
dose...

Current Mood: Happy Indeed!
Current Music: Blur- Charmless man

To say that I have missed this space would be a lie. To say that I missed writing would be true. My thoughts weren't of myself and the thoughts I had were too personal to put down anywhere. The past month has been such a whirwind of emotions, that I have had no time for myself. Last evening, reality caught up to me, as it has to. Answering to parents, mine and others', thinking about her, spending every spare moment with her, I forgot a lot of other things. A loss of balance means that I have to hit the floor sometime. And I have.

I am glad to have come back to the world, because it makes things more real. It puts my mast month in perspective and I do not view us any differently. That makes me glad, almost relieved. I didn't want to wake up and see that my world was a dream.

There are some tough times ahead. I have got to be there for a lot of people, and not forget myself. That sounds so much easier than it is. Being here for myself has become so tough lately.

Settling down to a working atmosphere, missing the group of awesome people I spent the last month with, finally finding the time to realise that my focus is wandering, and that my goals seem as undefined as the day I was born, I sit here today determined to do differently.

 

 

Current Mood: Thoughtful
Current Music: none