Disclaimer : Payne cannot review movies. The reason being that every movie he sees has him completely immersed no matter how crappy the storyline, how shitty the acting, how faecal-matter-ish the script, however bad the direction. 10 minutes after the credits have rolled past him, as he watches teary-eyed...he realises "wtf did i jus see??!". Ofcourse, this realisation does not in anyway change his opinion of the movie.
Why this all of a sudden? I'm just done watchin Kal Ho Na Ho. Now, the first half flies by in a colorful blur of a wide spectrum of winter wear , loud songs and Shah Rukh antics and by the time you know it Preity as fallen in love with him and so has Saif Ali fallen in love with her. How this happened, when this happened, WHY it happened is not clearly depicted nor is it given the time to be depicted. When Preity starts to bawl, I'm left wondering "WHHYY!", where was the chemistry? where were the powerful dialogues? where were the "look-me-in-the-eye-and-make-me-cry" scenes?! Saif a.k.a Rohit meanwhile has turned from useless casanova to faithful lover in the blink of an eye. At this point, any sane-minded individual with half the mental acumen that I pride myself to possess would have turned away and decided to chuck the movie (that individual would be my sister and yes she does have half my acumen). But this is me, Payne, remember?
Well, Hello Wisconsin! I make meself cozy and start to understand the intricacies of the wafer-thin characters in front of me...obviously I can totally identify with them and by now I have started to fall in love with all of 'em (acumen notwithstanding). SRK cries, PZ cries, SAK cries, everyone cries, everything actually does set itself into place though somewhere in the dark corners of my cranium there is a small voice shrieking "when the f_kk did they fall in love??!". I shut out that voice and decide to take in the Great Indian Cinematic Melodrama unfolding on me 20" TV. Ofcourse, there are a lot of useless comic reliefs thrown in...but not long enough for me to lose my goal >> To get Immersed. Back to the movie, SRK cries, PZ cries, SAK cries, rest of cast cries, I shout out "akka..sasthunaadu vaadu", SRK dies, I cries. I lost my acumen of verbal usage somewhere in that line, don't ask me where, I'm crying remember? :(
Credits roll by. Another faltoo movie watched by Payne and another 3 hrs gone by. On another front, the year's coming to an end been one helluva an year...not so many downs as ups. Still a lot to do...but all of this in another post.
signing out.
A visibly confused Payne as to what just happened in dat goddam movie.
Payne
Current Mood: Happy
Current Music: Rabbi - Bulla Ki Jaana...gotta hand it 2 d guy..hes made the word legal now..on Primetime TV!
