A Phrase Im Tired Of Already
Stand-Alone Dreamer | 22 February 2005, 8:21pmI hope you're all set and ready for another trip down 'Memory Lane', geographically located two blocks down the 'Know Your Role' Lane. Did you get it? That's what the WWF Superstar "The Rock" used to say before they got royally sued by the World Wildlife Federation and had to change their name to the WWE and totally sold out.
It's funny because it references the past!
The past...
-Back then, I used the word "ironic" all the time, even when it was clearly the wrong word to use. I'd say shit like, "Ironically, I was late today." And, "Ironically, I like butterscotch." Now I never use the word, because I don't really understand it and I'm pretty sure every usage is incorrect. It's all because of that goddamn song! Whenever life goes sour, I blame Alanis [Alanis Morissette].
-Back then, my favorite singer of all time was George Michael. Then someone told me that he was a gay, so now I'm not allowed to like him or HIS SONGS, because let's face it, I'm all man. I don't like the fact that homosexuals can just co-opt a song or a movie or any artwork and make it gay in the process. Where does it stop?
-Back then, I couldn't fathom how someone could become a stalker. Did they just wake up one morning and buy a telescope and a lawn chair so they could be more comfortable sitting in the shrubbery outside someone's bathroom window? Also, is there even one stalker story that ended well? Like, "I watched her sleep every night for three months, and now we're married!" Has that ever happened? Okay, that didn't really have anything to do with "back then..." but I really needed to let that out.
-Back then, I was really good at video games. I could play Mario without falling into the bottomless chasm of infinity OR accidentally touching a Goomba. No longer. If I try to play a video game now, the little man I'm controlling kills himself within three seconds of the start of the game. If he cannot find a molten lava pit to jump into, sometimes my little man brings along some virtual cyanide capsules just to be sure that I never get farther in any video game than the part that asks you to enter your name (I call myself "Alwayz Great").
-Back then, I used to actually BUY things. Like if a CD came out from a band I liked, I would go to the store and pay actual money I stole out of somewhere in exchange for music, rather than just getting it for free on the Internet. Or if there was a movie coming out on video, I would go all the way over to the shop and pay them for the privilege of watching the movie instead of just sitting at my computer and downloading it and then, 876 hours later, watching some German woman have sex with a Donkey in a grainy AVI file mistakenly labeled "The Incredibles." All that seems so silly now.
-Back then, my friends and I could keep each other entertained for hours just by spitting or hitting each other. Now we have Satellite TV, three video game cube systems (all of which I suck at), cars, and an almost unlimited supply of money, and still the number one phrase all of us always use is: "I'm bored, what do you want to do now?" Also, I can no longer answer anybody by spitting (or hitting) at them without getting my ass kicked.
-Back then, I was told by parents, teachers, and obese social workers that I should stay away from drugs and alcohol because if I didn't my life would spiral into a pit of round spirals and I would never make it anywhere in my career. Now where I'm, and the only lesson I've retained is that grown-ups are dirty liars.
-Back then, I hated cartoon network. All of the characters spoke too slowly and had really odd-shaped lips. Some things never change...
Current Mood: Thoughtful
Current Music: Back in the Day - Erykah Badu
Posted in Writing | Next | Previous | Comments (22) | Trackbacks (0)
1. By Aran | 22 Feb 2005, 9:21pm
How do you know she's German?
2. By rishabh | 22 Feb 2005, 9:29pm
hey man plzzzz increse da size of u r font. tis impossible ta read
3. By ask | 23 Feb 2005, 7:18am
good point aran ..lol...
4. By Stand-Alone Dreamer | 23 Feb 2005, 11:15am
German women rock; they say! Moreover the Nazi pervertism was all evident.. ;-)
But Interesting is the fact that..out of the 400 oddd words that I scribed down; a miniscule reference to this 'poor' German lass had got in two comments...
:-( Now I know how worse I write..
Rish: I'll try to that in order from the next post (too lazy this time
:-) )
5. By Aran | 23 Feb 2005, 11:31am
Ok, how do you get an almost unlimited supply of money?
ps. where do you live? :D
pps. French women are good too.
6. By mls | 23 Feb 2005, 2:10pm
You last two posts are quite good ...Keep 'em coming.
I hope its not "a ph(r)ase you're tired of already".
7. By Stand-Alone Dreamer | 23 Feb 2005, 7:04pm
Not in France..Unfortunately! ;-)
8. By Stand-Alone Dreamer | 23 Feb 2005, 7:06pm
Not in France..Unfortunately! ;-)
9. By Aran | 23 Feb 2005, 9:30pm
You didnt answer the most important question.
(Something's wrong with me.)
10. By Stand-Alone Dreamer | 23 Feb 2005, 9:53pm
Thot it was the most important!!;-)
I steal it, from the stock markets!
sssshhhhhh...Don't tell 'em.. You'll miss my blogs if I'm caught!
11. By Aran | 24 Feb 2005, 12:43am
Hmmm. WhattanEgo. I like.
12. By Stand-Alone Dreamer | 24 Feb 2005, 12:44am
The Ego? :-p
13. By Aran | 24 Feb 2005, 10:03am
And the unlimited money.
14. By M | 24 Feb 2005, 11:39am
(Ugh, typing this comment again!)
Thank goodness it's hitting AT your friends instead of ON them. Then you would seriously contradict your 'back then..George Michael' statement.
Then again, you could already be doing so!
15. By Stand-Alone Dreamer | 24 Feb 2005, 12:08pm
M: U know better!
As they say "Exceptions prove the rule" :D
Aaran: Ego and Money! Perfect Combo huh!?! But I curiosly did notice that little extra interest in 'money' :-P
16. By Aran | 24 Feb 2005, 2:01pm
What do u mean by extra? That's the only interest. :p
17. By Stand-Alone Dreamer | 24 Feb 2005, 3:04pm
I thot it started with "How do I know that She is German?" & "The Ego"
May be different ways to get there..
Hmmm...
18. By Aran | 24 Feb 2005, 3:11pm
Can't just start off with the money, can I? :p
19. By Stand-Alone Dreamer | 24 Feb 2005, 3:53pm
Mummy alwayz says "Stay away from people who come you only for your money.."
;-)
Thinking....!!!
20. By Aran | 24 Feb 2005, 4:36pm
Oh no. I come here for the words. ;)