5 Nov 2005, 11:16pm
When I say whatever I want to...
Posted by Script Writer | Category [ General ]Comments (29) | Trackbacks (0)
Courtesy a fellow blogger (Why am I using a phrase as hackneyed as this? Sigh!), my perspective on all things pornographic has undergone a slight metamorphosis. I have started to perceive them as more than means of healthy recreation.
Make no mistake. I have always held porn in the highest regard and have always believed the likes of Sindee Coxx, Sylvia Saint, Asia Carrerra, Dolly Golden, Lita Chase, Coral Sands, Tabatha Cash, Gina La Marca, Anna Nicole Smith, Brande Rodericks, Sally Layd, Jay Sweet, and Vanessa to be women with some serious substance (no pun inadvertently intended - it was intentional) in them. And even if it makes people doubt my lifestyle choice, for the women who read my blog I thought I should name a few men too - Peter North, Vince Voyeur, Drago, and Rocko, in no particular order.
Having seen enough moving pictures of this genre to have reached a stage where I can detach myself completely when the 'mechanical motion' is on in full swing, I can safely say that I have begun to appreciate the nuances of making movies that would have any four of these stories:
But it is not as easy as it looks. In my time (this is not to say that I was ever a part of the industry (somehow to me the phrase just sounds classy) or that I am now old (what if I am balding and half my teeth are gone?)), I learnt through what I choose to describe as informational reading material that you need stunt doubles for these movies too. No, there is no jumping off a building or racing through a freeway here. The stunt doubles are used for those pressing times of need when the actor's pecker just refuses to rise to the occasion. A whole legion of men has been gainfully employed by this industry to render this specific service. Nifty camerawork ensures that we only see what they are doubling up for.
Sometimes the ease with which the actors get into impossible positions leaves one with their jaws touching the floor. As if it was not enough hard work, did they have to make it harder by doing it underwater? Or with the woman's legs spread so wide you could drive an eighteen-wheeler through? What's the idea? To tell us that sex takes superhuman effort? Yeah, that is why we are a nation of one billion. Just imagine if it was any easier!
So what was the change in perspective that I gloated over? That I have started to perceive them as more than means of healthy recreation. But I already said that. Why did I write so much more then? Because it is my blog and I can write whatever I want to.
Current Mood: Gloomy
Current Music: I am too sexy...
Make no mistake. I have always held porn in the highest regard and have always believed the likes of Sindee Coxx, Sylvia Saint, Asia Carrerra, Dolly Golden, Lita Chase, Coral Sands, Tabatha Cash, Gina La Marca, Anna Nicole Smith, Brande Rodericks, Sally Layd, Jay Sweet, and Vanessa to be women with some serious substance (no pun inadvertently intended - it was intentional) in them. And even if it makes people doubt my lifestyle choice, for the women who read my blog I thought I should name a few men too - Peter North, Vince Voyeur, Drago, and Rocko, in no particular order.
Having seen enough moving pictures of this genre to have reached a stage where I can detach myself completely when the 'mechanical motion' is on in full swing, I can safely say that I have begun to appreciate the nuances of making movies that would have any four of these stories:
- Delivery man knocks on the door of a lonely woman whose husband is away on a business trip
- Aspiring actress pleases producer (could be male or female)
- Small town bloke exploited in the city by a wealthy woman
- Secretary and boss (do I need to say more?)
- Hapless woman with a broken down car in the middle of nowhere is given a, umm, ride by a good Samaritan
- Man/woman is given a demo of the 'toys' by the lady behind the counter of a sex shop
- Horny woman realises self help is the best help
- Coach/teacher instructs on more than math/science/tennis/it does not matter
- Cop strip searches a man/woman
- Bride makes it with the best men (could number between 1 and 3) when she discovers the groom and the bridesmaids (could number between 1 and 4) together
- Hot couples' therapist (always female) infuses life into dead marriage
- Businesswoman goes all the way to broker deals
But it is not as easy as it looks. In my time (this is not to say that I was ever a part of the industry (somehow to me the phrase just sounds classy) or that I am now old (what if I am balding and half my teeth are gone?)), I learnt through what I choose to describe as informational reading material that you need stunt doubles for these movies too. No, there is no jumping off a building or racing through a freeway here. The stunt doubles are used for those pressing times of need when the actor's pecker just refuses to rise to the occasion. A whole legion of men has been gainfully employed by this industry to render this specific service. Nifty camerawork ensures that we only see what they are doubling up for.
Sometimes the ease with which the actors get into impossible positions leaves one with their jaws touching the floor. As if it was not enough hard work, did they have to make it harder by doing it underwater? Or with the woman's legs spread so wide you could drive an eighteen-wheeler through? What's the idea? To tell us that sex takes superhuman effort? Yeah, that is why we are a nation of one billion. Just imagine if it was any easier!
So what was the change in perspective that I gloated over? That I have started to perceive them as more than means of healthy recreation. But I already said that. Why did I write so much more then? Because it is my blog and I can write whatever I want to.
Current Mood: Gloomy
Current Music: I am too sexy...
6 Nov 2005, 4:29pm
I'm feeling so relieved that I changed my perception of you in time. Otherwise I'd just be shocked beyond recovery.
So what's more than healthy recreation? You look at them as works of art now?
And should I like the fact that you're holding me resonsible for where you are right now?
I had other thoughts while reading your post, but I do not think this is the place for them, so no.
6 Nov 2005, 4:34pm
Let's have a deal. You tell me what other thoughts crossed your mind and I will tell you what's more than healthy recreation.
And, yes, you should like the fact that you are resposible for giving me direction. That is big responsibility.
6 Nov 2005, 4:48pm
But I said this was not the place for it! Elsewhere maybe?
6 Nov 2005, 7:31pm
What other place is there that could possibly be any better for you to spew your thoughts on?
6 Nov 2005, 10:12pm
Well, let's see. There are 3 - IM, my place and this place. I think IM should do.
8 Nov 2005, 7:38am
?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!
8 Nov 2005, 7:44am
Remember!"I perceive my blog audience as an extension of me. Their misperspective is my my misperspective." is it? By no means i would as a blog audience would like to be precived like a who have nothing else on mind but crap!
8 Nov 2005, 7:45am
insert "person" b/w a & who.
9 Nov 2005, 1:02am
Twigrl, it saddens me deeply that you should think that I only have crap on my mind. I have lots more on my mind beside it. At any rate, there is such a thing as elevating crapping to an art form.
Fellow blogger, why is it that when you comment Aran does not?
9 Nov 2005, 1:04am
Because. :)
9 Nov 2005, 1:07am
This has to be the shortest reply I have ever received to any answer. And it is grammatically incorrect!
Why, fellow blogger, why? I thought you liked me enough to at least write down a grammatically pure sentence.
9 Nov 2005, 2:47am
Oh but don't think of it as a sentence. Let is be more of an 'ishaara'.
9 Nov 2005, 2:48am
Sigh. is = it.
9 Nov 2005, 10:30pm
Please give a courtesy flash if you are using Nora Roberts’s theme…
9 Nov 2005, 10:43pm
Sorry! 3x ha twigrl! learn learn from your mistakes
19 Nov 2005, 12:45am
What is wrong with you?
19 Nov 2005, 1:32pm
Let's not walk down this road, Twigrl. It will take more disk space than the entire internet has as of this moment to tell you that.
22 Nov 2005, 11:02pm
I hope you feel better and come back to being yourself. Take it easy! take care.
24 Nov 2005, 10:18am
Twigrl, what makes you think I am not myself?
24 Nov 2005, 12:13pm
Omg Scripto, Twigrl's last comment was infinitely precious! Can't help but adore the girl. Sympathy?! :D
24 Nov 2005, 10:27pm
No sympathy, Aran. How can you do anything but adore this precious little creature?
27 Nov 2005, 12:59am
Heeyyyyy! Aran! what's up?
Mr Writer: The comment to whats wrong? sounded so much like you have indian movie story to tell..so i figured somehting must be really wrong....since, you are a rational creature walking this earth and so sounded so uha...i had a conflicting images of yours in my mind...and that made me think no this dude is kinda acting weird...thats being nice i wrote mr get back you being you.
28 Nov 2005, 9:19pm
Hehehe. Hi Twigrl. I think this is the only place where someone other than the owner of the blog is being adored so much. Btw, I lost myself somewhere along the thrid line of your comment to Scripto. But don't you mind me. You go on bindaas. :D
28 Nov 2005, 9:20pm
Blah. Typo. Third.
29 Nov 2005, 5:04am
smiles...just Where you been Aran? long time.
Where babes where did i got you lost the uha thing or scripto being rational...;).... and look at you pointing out the typo to me..hehehe i had to look twice to figure that out..j/k...anyways...keep showing up so that we can talk...i don't know about next 3 week but after that i am gonna be a regular visiter...alright then
Mr Writer: write some thing or just do something so that i can track your blog...i am loosing it and thats no good.
30 Nov 2005, 9:36am
Been around Twigrl. Now what exactly is 'uha'?
2 Dec 2005, 1:24am
hehehe i don't know what it is exactly....i usually use it when i don't know how to word my feelings.
14 Dec 2005, 4:20pm
hilarious!
2 Feb 2006, 3:48pm
totally hilarious ...seriously, i fell from my chair laughing .....