algorithmic randomizations !

hmm ..today felt like a blogging day ..
Wow !! Its been a week already at my first real job ever, feels like i started yesterday ..all tense..all worried that i might just turn out to be the dumbest person in the whole batch ..that i might get the definition of 'booting' all wrong in the first class, that i might be all shouted at for not being 'professional' , that i might spill the free coffee , that i might get late every single day ..that i might jus go to work and discover that my name isnt on the list at all !!
Yes, i was paranoid.
Not all of that happened though. I got a little late,but then so did the 90 other trainees :-)
I didnt spill coffee, cos i couldnt find the coffee machine.The only question i was asked was my name, i couldnt get that wrong !My name WAS on the list, twas the last name on the list !!
Its been alright, its not really a happy thing to be told every single day, that the only stupid constant thing in the IT industry is change..that we could get thrown out if we didnt 'learn' every single day , that having fun meant coding an online scrabble ..it wasnt entirely a thrilling experience to start studyin all the 20 odd subjects that i had already covered during my engineering ..and then to be tested on all that ..all over again ..:-|.
But there is a bright side ...the food is awesome !! Subsidised prices and what not ..The id cards are neat ..makes u feel all important ..the campus ..the office that is ..looks really nice when it rains ..the local train rides are comfortable and a lot of fun .I also finally have a designation ..im a PAT ..a programmer analyst trainee..yayyiee...Its a whole new world ..a world thats tough , but pays you back in more ways than one ..
Is this what i really wanna do ?! Thats a question ill keep asking myself throughout my life ..
So, until i find the answer to that one,keep wishin me luck !
:)


Current Mood: Happy
Current Music: none

Its been so so long since i posted anything.Here i am now,hoping that my straightened hair doesnt curl up in this hot and humid Chennai ..
Two weddings, one that was a consequence of love,and the other that consequently resulted in love. Weddings two years back for me used to be nothing more than food festivals , but now everytime i watch the whole ceremony, i invariably end up all moist eyed and emotional ....i just cant hold back the tears when i see the parents of the groom and the bride all relieved and happpy ..relieved that a 'burden' is now off their shoulders ..happy cos their son/daughter hasnt made the wrong choice ..hasnt 'strayed' and has kept the family banner flyin ..high ..
So as i sat in the first row watchin endless rituals being performed ...none of them understood by anybody ..includin the priests .. wondered if their was room for change anymore ..
If people could truly love and still truly keep everybody happy ..if it was wrong to love and go blind ..or if it was right to dance to some match maker's tunes ..
Both the couples were made for each other they said ..and there was more than one occasion when i had people from my family comin to me and whisperin 'Paaru paaru ...arranged kalyanam pannindu kudai avaa evvaloo happy aa irikaa ...nee kudai ibbidiai kalyanam panniko' ..Translation : 'See see ..theyve had an arranged marriage..but look at them theyre so happy ..u learn ..u also get married like this'

:D

Well ..not a bad thought ..

I was sick throughout the weddings ..gettin drenched in the hyd rains on the day of the journey wasnt such a good idea afterall...so i had to sniff my way through the dancing,the pujas and all the madness ...

The revelation..
That planning doesnt help ..ever ...that 'going with the flow' actually means 'dont even decide when to wake up tomorrow' ..
That strength is not something u can jus buy at a store ..its jus something that happens like a bad hair day ...unexpected and really inevitable ..

The Shatabdi express from Bangalore to Madras is awesome !! You get really good food ..at the right times ...the air conditioning is perfect..and best of all ..it does not halt at every street in town ..:)

Life goes on ...


Current Mood: Confused
Current Music: none